Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
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