He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
