glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I wish I only lived at night.
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And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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