The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
3pm strippers are depressing
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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