I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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