There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
