I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
