Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I cut my penus on the lid.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
