Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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