Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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