I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Small penises have feelings too.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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