this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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