What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize