Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
she looked like the before picture.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
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