dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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