It's like God shit irony all over that family
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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