She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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