Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
is wine microwaveable?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
