conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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