Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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