Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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