There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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