what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
