I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
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