Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
