So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize