Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
