'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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