i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
try to milk me bitch
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