he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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