Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
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