32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
