you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
third nipple confirmed
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
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