i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
