how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
