I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
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while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
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Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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