are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
