woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
my god I love twenty year old dicks
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
