butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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