Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize