i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
