I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
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