Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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