it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
