You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
