I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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