just come out here and I will go home with you...
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You're a waste of cheezeits
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize
