you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize