3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Randomize