Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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